...Big Girl Panties? Size 6????

Who are you kidding? I haven't seen a size 6 since I WAS 6!!!!

But, I love the reality check! I dealt with it and now I'm over it. You know, the whole turning-40 thing. Nothing changed. Nada. Well except the fact that I NOW own a pair of size 6 panties. And pink ones to boot.

Although, I'm glad they're attached to a gallon-sized paint can - AND I'm sure everyone else is glad too! I think, in them, I'd look... on the other hand, it's probably better NOT to go down that imaginary path, if you know what I mean.

So, anyways, an enormous, heartfelt THANK YOU to all those who celebrated my special milestone birthday with me. I'll only turn 40 once and I had lots of fun and enjoyed every single beautiful, personal, funny, floral, antique, gift-certificate, culinary and home-decor gift that was bestowed upon me.

I love them all!!!

It's not so bad.....

In fact, yesterday, was pretty good!

I was awakened at 6:30 am! (for those who know me, you KNOW I'm NOT a morning person), by my cel phone ringing. It was my dear mother calling to wish me a Happy Birthday. She was in Oklahoma (she's a long haul truck driver, so we never really know where she's at) and when I asked her if she knew what time it was, she said, "Of course. I have a watch!"

She had great news about meeting her long-lost baby sister, who coincidentally is my age - one month older to be exact, that was put up for adoption at birth. Her name is Kim and she just so happens to live in Oklahoma! Mom would be meeting her for the first time around noon OK time.

The weird thing is, Mom's oldest sister, Catherine, and I have the same birthday - April 23. Catherine was killed in a car accident on Feb 1 - my mom's 18th birthday, 2 months before I was born. And now, my mom gets to meet her youngest sister on my birthday. Weird!

I saw some pictures of Kim today and she sure looks like family! Mom's nose/profile and June's (another of mom's younger sisters) smile and dimples. Mom's spent a long time looking for "the little sister" and now, as of yesterday, they've finally met! Nice!

Next, on the day's list, I came to work to find the cute little birthday song from my best friend, Phillip. The song lyrics are hysterical, but the words he wrote brought tears to my eyes....

Then, I get a bouquet of beautiful pink roses from my friend, Kay. Thanks Kay!

I got a unique wind chime that just screams "Tina-style" from my friend, Janice. I'm not sure where she found such a thing, but it's a door face-plate complete with clear glass door knobs that has the chimes made from skelton keys. Too stinking cute! Plus, an old potato masher with red flaking paint - what for? Janice had to remind me. (I'm old now, remember?) I had mentioned to her a few weeks ago that I wanted one...Oh yeah, to make a note holder. The masher side down and a close pin fastened to the handle, sticking up to use as a clip to hold a note or a photo. Thanks, Janice for the gifts and for the reminder.....!

Kristin surprised me as well - I'm still chuckling... The "Don't Panic" mug filled with my favorite - CHOCOLATE!!!!!! Dove dark chocolate no less. I've already started eating them. AND guess what? I found the most fitting verse in Chocolate #3...Yes, I've eaten THREE so far. What's another pound at 40? AGE IS NOTHING BUT A NUMBER.


Thanks to Melissa McG.... too. What a REAL surprise! To get a card from one of my newest friends. We are more like collaborative scrapbook pals at this point - she is a customer who just so happens to see me everytime I work at the scrapbook store - which isn't so often, so either she is there everyday (Melissa, does your hubby know?) or it's just been Karma that we see each other every time I'm there. Hopefully, we will continue to grow as friends.

Lastly, last night was Kyle's academic masters competition with the 3 other county high schools. He did very well and placed 3rd. I think he should have at least placed second, as he did really well. Several of the students that did very well didn't place 1st or 2nd either, so something seemed a bit strange....Who knows?! I wasn't a judge, so apparently they saw something in the first place winners that I didn't.

So, today, I'm 40+ 1 day and it's not so bad......

Not the Traditional Happy Birthday Song....

I couldn't get this song to post without Phillip's birthday greeting, but it was too dang funny (and fitting!) not to share! Plus, I know I'm loved and am loving growing up/old with him as well!!!!!

"are the hair's on your head turning gray?"
"is your favorite hobby sleeping?"
"always got a pain or an ache?"
"wrinkles need ironing?"
"dangling bits all droopin'?"
"then you're very, very, very, very old!"

"if you think birthdays are a curse, well the alternative is worse...."

**** click on the link below to hear "my" song
http://www.happybirthdaytoyou.com/c.php?f=Apr081208972349264&p=r

***this photo was taken by Kristin on Monday, April 28 at my croppin' birthday party with the girls. German Chocolate Cake - my fave and an adorable cupcake embroidered doily (the embroidered cupcake isn't visible in the photo, but it's cu-ooot!)

2 hours and counting......

Midnight is near. That can only mean one thing. 40! Yup, FORTY!!!

Tomorrow morning I will wake up a new woman. I will no longer be in the 30-something populus. No turning back. The gray hairs. The achey joints. The weight gain. The menstrual cramps. The migraines. OK. I admit, those were already there, so maybe 40 won't be so different after all.

I guess I'll just continue to enjoy everyday - everyday! Soon enough, I'll be looking at 50! Then, I'm sure I'll have even more gray hair, more aches and pains, hopefully no more weight gain and maybe, just maybe, there will be no more menstrual cramps or migraines!!! But wait, then I'll be moaning and groaning about the hot flashes, trying to remember to take those hormone pills, and complaining about how when I was 40, I should have taken better care of my skin....

Oh, how I'll enjoy being forty. But in procrastinator-Tina-fashion, I'm gonna wait until tomorrow!

New Porch = New Door

So here it is. My "dream" door to welcome my friends and family to my new porch.

The porch is still a ways off, but when it arrives, this will be THE door.

I can imagine the porch with its dual, creamy white, Craftsman-style columns atop their square rock bases. The bungalow-style, multiple concrete steps, complete with the planter platforms on the left and the right, leading up to the painted wood-planked floor of the covered porch. So cozy with the bench, blooming flower pots and, finally, I'll unpack my garden and holiday flags to fly on one column. I'll even get to add the house numbers and maybe a wall-hung mail box. I can't wait. Really, I'm so excited. I can't wait!!!

It'll be so fun to decorate for each special occasion and season. Flower pots in the Spring; RED, WHITE and BLUE for the 4th of July; Pumpkins on the stairs for Fall; and those adorable mini-evergreens with their bases wrapped in burlap and tied with raffia for Christmas. Oh, it'll be the entry porch I've always, ALWAYS wanted!!!

Growing up.

As blogged by my 17 year old - going on 30 - son, Kyle. Oh to be 17 again....


Sunday, April 13, 2008

A blog for the broken hearted...

If life seems to get you down because a recent love has let you down, then heres my philosophy to you!

You need to be strong. Plain and simple as that, and if you think it is too tough to do, then remember this simple fact:

The heart is a muscle, and like any other muscle among your fleshy being, it can get torn, damaged, hurt, crushed, bruised, or any number of those other "charming" words. And like those other muscles when it gets the chance to recover, it will heal stronger than ever before and will be that much harder to break the next time around.

With that said, you need to be, and can be strong. All you need to do is stay positive, keep moving forward in your life, and give your heart all the time it needs to recover. If you try to force your heart into a speedy recovery by lying to yourself and saying it doesn't hurt, then you wont strengthen your heart; you will harden it. If you harden your heart, you will only put a shell around it that is harder for others to get into, but if you strengthen your heart, you will eventually love again and it will be more powerful than ever before.

Another thing is that you can't dwell on the past, because the painful fact is that you can't change it. Your muscles are weak and they will rip easily if they haven't fully healed, so if you keep sulking over something that can't be helped you will perpetually negate any, and all progress you have made on the road to recovery. Distance yourself from the painful thoughts by distracting yourself with other things like work, school, or even some new people (just make sure they aren't the wrong kind of people). Keep trudging through the darkness of your tunnel. Before you know it you will be through the gloom and see that there is a big world just waiting for you to put your mark on it, and you can't make that mark if you don't get out there.

So when you are feeling down just take a step back, a couple of deep breaths, and know that things will get better as long as you perservere through your tribulations and keep moving forward. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, and when you're stronger, you can achieve that much more. Just remember that your heart is a muscle, and the only way to make muscles stronger is to put them through a workout. And the more difficult and more painful the workout is, the stronger your muscles will become.


Whatever happens happens, and its always for a reason!

P.S. If my advice doesn't help, then read this through once more, but with "Move Along" by The All-American Rejects playing in the background.

Gloom? Doom? or just plain Melancholy?

I don't know what it is about the last couple of days, but I'm just not my happy little self. Maybe it's the weather - sunny one moment, over-cast and gloomy the next? Maybe it's the overwhelming sense of lots to do and not enough time to do it? Maybe it's....

I just can't seem to snap out of it. I feel tired and a bit rundown. Chilled to the bone. Even the instant coffee I've been putting in my hot chocolate hasn't had the "perky" effect on me that it usually does.

I am happy that the changes around the house are moving in a positive direction. I'm very proud of Kyle for winning 1st place Academic Masters at his school in Social Studies - the next level of competition takes place on April 23 - which just so happens to be my birthday. Ty seems to be doing ok in Austin. A.J. is doing ok in school, with his friends and his girl ... friend. Phillip continues to work hard everyday - I can't even begin to imagine the pressure, but thank you, honey.

Maybe it's because I've been home more than usual and that is throwing me out of sync. ??? Funny, though. I really do like being home and tinkering, but I just can't get out of the funk I'm in right now. I can't seem to focus - even with my glasses on or my contacts in!

Maybe tomorrow will be clearer and brighter. Maybe...."the sun will come out tomorrow..."

I AM SO READY FOR SOME WARM AND SUNNY DAYS!!!!!!

*** photo is of me on Christmas Day many years ago. Must have been in a "frump" then as well.

Introducing....Myles!

So this is Myles. (pronounced: Miles)

He is A.J.'s new veiled Chameleon. He is approximately 30 days old. A.J. put him on lay-away a couple of weeks ago (well, not exactly him, but the "future" him). Yesterday, afterschool, A.J. got an email from the reptile shop that the Chameleons had arrived. A.J. could hardly contain himself. He wanted to go into town NOW! But, alas, he would have to wait and practice patience.

So, today, since there was no school, A.J went in to work with Phillip. Erik and the two of them had "craft-day" at work building a Chameleon cage. After work, Phillip, A.J. and I, went to the store to take a look. They had two, a male & a female on display - and approximately 100 more upstairs! Yes, 100!!! Apparently, these little reptiles lay 30+ eggs per clutch! Poor mommies!!! I've got 3 kids. I can't imagine adding a zero!!!

Anyway, A.J. picked the male and he held him. Now if you know me at all, you know that reptiles make my skin crawl. I can appreciate them from afar, like on t.v., but I'll jump out of my skin if even a teeny-tiny lizard runs anywhere near me. Even the sound of dry leaves crackling under their weight makes my skin get goose pimples! BUT - and this is HUGE! - I let A.J. put him on my hand and I actually held him. He was so little and calm. His movements are really slow like a little old man (or woman - maybe a woman of, say, 40!!!) His eye (singular) looked up a me and the other eye was looking a totally different direction to stare at A.J. Really weird to watch, but not creepy. I wasn't afraid!!! I wasn't even nervous! I even kind of liked him!!!!

A.J. has been working hard doing various chores and "sonny-do's" around the house to earn money to buy the cage materials, supplies, and Myles. He still has about $25 left to pay on him. Keep up the good work, A.J. and about the time your new room is ready for you, you'll have yourself a new roommate!

20 to 40!!!!

So, today I realized that I have 20 days until my 40th birthday. I've always thought it wouldn't be a big deal. I remember thinking, when each of my boys was born, that I would be 38 when Ty turned 18, 40 when Kyle turned 18 and then 43 when A.J. turned 18. So turning 40 really isn't a big deal. Almost everyone I know has already turned 40. I was always the "youngest". So why do I find myself thinking about it at least once or twice a day???

Maybe I'm supposed to think about it. As in, over-the-hill (or is that 50? - I hope, I hope!) Maybe 40 is the "new" 20??? Maybe, because my 25th wedding anniversary is only 2 years away?

Well, whatever the reason, I'm turning 40 in 20 days and life as I know it couldn't be better. Lots of changes happening where I live. The front porch is officially GONE. Non-existent. There is a huge chunk of roof-line missing and a wading pool where the concrete patio used to be. Maybe we shouldn't build a bedroom. Maybe the "pool" would be better???? No, not really. We've had a pool before and they really aren't all they're cracked up to be. Year-round maintenance for only a few weeks of pleasure. Now a spa on the other hand...that's one that's on the list of dreams...just outside the new master suite. Yes, that's the plan...Someday.....

So, now that the porch is gone, poor Wonka and our "inherited" outdoor cat, Hoodoo (therein lies another story!) don't know what to think. When I opened the soon-to-be-gone front door tonight, there they were, in the "pool", looking up to me. The look on Wonkas face says it all - "O.k. Mom, how am I supposed to open the door and let myself in now?" You see, ever since Phillip changed the front door handle to the thumb latch-type about 3 years ago, Wonka quickly learned how to let himself in the door.

Shortly following that discovery, we taught him to close the door on command. "Shut the door Wonka!" "Close the door Wonka!" Before long, we would hear him come in - toenails click-click on the floor - Then, WHAM! the door shuts! Ok. Maybe that's an exaggeration. It's not always a WHAM! Sometimes, he shuts it gently. So gently, that when we didn't hear the door shut, we tell him to close the door and he just stands there looking at us to say, "Hey, dummy. I already closed it!!!" Good dog.